Coulda, Shoulda, Woulda, Did!
by stars90
Summary: All those moments that you wish had gone differently, or even moments that never happened you wish had, now they happen the way you want them to! A series of one-shots depicting alternate resolutions to annoying Caskett denseness. (I welcome any and all ideas, just PM me. I'm trying to stick with unique resolutions or seldom used moments.)


Disclaimer: If I owned Castle, I'm willing to bet it wouldn't be half as popular.

**2x20- 'The Late Shaft' What if Castle hadn't been quite so keen on going out with Ellie Monroe? What if he'd had to put up a fight about it on TV and said something he shouldn't have?**

Castle marched onto the stage, waving energetically to the crowd of applauding fans before taking his seat next to the actress he'd met in the makeup room, Ellie Monroe.

"So, I understand you've been doing research with actual law enforcement officers developing Nikki Heat." Came the question from the show's cohost, Bobby Mann.

"Yes, and after all this time, they still won't let me carry a gun." After the laughter from Castle's snark died down, Monroe turned to him with a simpering smile.

"You know, I did not know that. That's actually kind of my weak point. Law enforcement."

Castle turned to her with a very fake smile while scrambling for some way to deflect the obvious route she was taking, but Mann beat him to the punch.

"Well, you're both single, aren't you?"

Monroe nodded vigorously while reaching for Castle's arm, but Rick wasn't having any of it.

"You know, I'm flattered, truly I am, but the truth is I'm still doing a lot of research for the next Nikki Heat book, my entire calendar is pretty much full these days in between that and finding time to write…"

"Oh come on, Ricky, I'm sure you could find some time…"

"Really, I have enough trouble finding time for the things I'm already committed to, I couldn't subject you to a relationship right now."

"You do think I'm attractive, don't you?"

Castle was getting a little bit weary with how hard she was trying to back him into the corner. "Of course I do, Ellie, but-"

"Then what's the problem? Can't handle being around an attractive woman?"

"Well-"

Mann took this moment to cut in, obviously thinking about the ratings he'd get if two celebrities got together on his show. "Yeah, Rick. Can't handle the heat?" The zing sound and accompanying laughter was seriously getting Castle's hackles up.

"Well, I'm not really into the whole pretty face dating scene anyway these days."

"Oh, Rick! Did you know that Ms. Monroe actually began her career as a model? She still does it part-time. How can you say no to a model?"

By this point it was taking all of Castle's self-control to keep his lips arranged in something vaguely reminiscent of a smile, as well as his tone even. "Oh, Bobby, Bobby, Bobby. Let me tell you something. I know a thing or two about models, you see plenty of them in the circles I run in and I can tell you this. If I couldn't keep control of myself around a model I'd have been seriously dead a bunch of times over the last two years."

Mann frowned. "What do you mean by that?"

"Well, I go into work every day with a detective that could've bankrupted the business. If I had no self-control, I would've wound up with bullet holes by the second day. "

"Really? How do you get anything done in that kind of atmosphere?"

"Simple. She expects better of me."

"Sounds like her opinion matters a lot to you. Something going on there you want to tell us about?"

Castle's eyes went steely. "Her opinion matters to me just like it matters to every rational person who's met her. That's simply her personality. She's not a person anyone would want to disappoint because if you've disappointed her, you are a disappointing person, end of discussion."

* * *

When Castle came back to the loft later that night, still contemplating the odd parting words of Bobby Mann about someone wanting to kill him, he found his mother and Alexis sitting on the couch, the looks on their faces making it clear he had just interrupted a rather heavy session of girl talk. The point where he started getting worried, however, was when those looks slowly began morphing into smirks.

"So Richard, what's your plan for tomorrow?"

Castle frowned, not quite sure what his daughter was talking about. "Tomorrow?"

"Yeah, running the gauntlet with Detective Beckett. How are you planning on getting in and out with both legs screwed on straight?"

"W-What did I do?"

The two women raised their eyebrows as one, both wearing the same incredulous mask at this latest example of male foolishness.

"Dad- you just declared that you loved her on network television."

Castle ran rapidly over his memories of the interview, wondering just what on Earth two of his three favorite women were getting at. When he came to a certain memory of a certain few sentences, he stopped short, his face losing every inch of color.

"I'm dead."

Martha and Alexis just looked at each other, their expressions mirroring one another.

'_No kidding.' _Their faces were saying.

* * *

Castle walked into the precinct the next day, holding Beckett's customary coffee and wondering just what kind of purgatory he was walking into. On the way to Beckett's desk he bumped into Ryan and Esposito, their looks conveying the same thing.

'_Better you than us, bro.'_

Moving swiftly past them and trying to keep his heart beating steadily for its final moments, Castle approached the desk and laid down the coffee gingerly, hoping against hope if he was quiet enough she might not notice him.

No such luck. The second the coffee was down her head shot around to pin him down with lightning speed, her glare terrifying.

"Uh, Um- Beckett…"

"Break room. Now," she growled.

He scampered in, trying to ignore the looks being sent his way by the other cops who seemed to be looking at a condemned prisoner on his way to his hanging. Beckett marched in behind him and slammed the door behind her.

"What were you thinking? Why couldn't you just say no like a normal person!?"

"Well-"

"Do you have any idea how much trouble you've caused for me?!"

"Um-"

"Just because you couldn't bring yourself to say no, you had to make up some BS about me! Why did you have to drag me into this?! You couldn't come up with some other lie that didn't involve me-"

"Whoa, whoa, wait a second, I never lied."

Beckett folded her arms and gave him a 'get real' stare. "'If she's disappointed in you you're a disappointing person?'"

"Yeah."

Castle's answer was so matter-of-fact that the wind was knocked right out of Beckett's sails.

"W-What?"

"I said, yeah. That's the truth."

Beckett searched his face, looking for any of the signs she'd been careful to memorize over the last two years that indicate he's lying or joking. She found none.

"'C-could've bankrupted the business?'"

"Kate, I've been around supermodels. I've talked with them. You make every one of them look like the witch out of _The Wizard of Oz._

Kate could barely breathe. When she'd heard Castle on TV her entire world had tilted on its axis. She'd never had anyone think so highly of her, say such things about her. Never mind say them on network television! The only thing that had gotten her through the night was when, an hour after the show ended, she'd convinced herself Castle had only said those things to get out of the date. Her blinding fury at that hadn't been that much easier to sleep through, but it had been easier to deal with. Only now, Castle was reaffirming it, no cameras, no date threats. Just him saying these incredible things about her in the same manner one uses to explain that the sky was blue. Kate just stood there, speechless, her mouth opening and closing repeatedly as she tried to make some sense of this. Castle stood nearby, looking as though he were waiting for impending doom.

Kate stood there for minutes bleeding into hours, or so it felt like. She had no idea how to react to this. She had fallen back on anger because she knew how to handle that. But this…. There was only one thought that came to her mind, and she quashed it out of habit if for no other reason. But he just stood there, looking so sure of what he had said and so adorably nervous, that her body reacted without her consent (That was her story and she was sticking with it). So she did the only logical thing- she closed the distance and kissed him. Castle jumped as she touched him, and was apparently quite shocked, not responding to her for a full five seconds. Once he did, though- it was pure, unadulterated bliss.

Eventually that pesky need for oxygen got in the way, and Kate pulled back. Castle stood there, looking absolutely stunned.

"Not that I'm complaining, because _believe me_, I'm not, but why did you do that?"

Kate shrugged playfully. "I dunno, just seemed like the right idea. And I've heard lately that my judgment is pretty good, so I went for it."

"Hmmm. If that's how it ends… how much do you think I'd have to pay Ellie Monroe to come in and fail to ask me out again?"

Kate gave him the grin she knew turned him to mush before turning to the door.

"I don't know, Castle. But why don't you try to ask me out and see if that works well enough."

And with that she sashayed out. Castle, a stunned but blinding grin on his face, hastened to follow.

**Please review and send in your ideas!**


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